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Glasgow cop requests backup for pursuing drone… that was actually the planet Jupiter

In baseball they call it a “rookie error,” though famously salty-tongued Glaswegians are doubtlessly using other terms to describe it. A new cop in Glasgow’s police force called in for backup last week after somehow mistaking the planet Jupiter as a threateningly pursuing drone.

A drone, largest planet in the solar system – anyone could confuse ’em

Given Glasgow’s former reputation as a tough, hard-drinking, poverty-plagued, working-class city that once boasted the title of Europe’s crime and murder capital, some observers might be inclined to cut the timorous young cop some slack for mistaking Jupiter as a sinister pursuing drone during the now-infamous July 13 night patrol. Yet not sympathetic enough to excuse misidentifying a planet 365 million miles away as a menacingly hounding quadcopter – especially not after midnight, when all of Scotland’s pubs were closed tight, eliminating being “bevvied up” as a possible reason. 

Scottish media reported the greenhorn constable became alarmed shortly after leaving a Glasgow police station just after midnight, and noticed an elevated bright object trailing the police car’s every move. After the hovering orb continued to follow the otherwise normal nocturnal patrol, the increasingly concerned officer undertook more elaborate maneuvers to lose the pursuing object. The chase wound through a shopping mall, and along a stretch of the M8 motorway, but the relentless flying stalker remained unshakable through it all.

Cop was actually pursuing a planet

Perhaps mindful of Glasgow’s notorious past – and current reputation as one of the UK’s centers of new tech and innovation – the rookie apparently figured the development might be a thug-meets-geek collaboration seeking to settle some score with The Law. As a result, the harassing drone was phoned in as an in-process threat to the general Scotland Police complaints number. Dispatchers instructed the shaken cop to return to the station and report the pursing drone directly to senior officials.

When the station’s veteran higher-ups came into the parking area, they found the rattled recruit hiding from the audacious drone that had not just followed the patrol car to the station, but continued hovering in plain sight just above. It was at the point that the elder cops explained that the sinister, dogged white dot wasn’t the lights of a drone, but rather Jupiter – which is often visible over Glasgow in certain seasons and weather conditions.

“Nobody can quite believe it,” a police source told The Daily Record, noting the rookie “was very alarmed and spooked… [at] being followed by a drone.”

“Everyone was quite concerned so you can imagine the red face and embarrassment felt when it was pointed out that the bright light following… was a planet millions of miles away.”

It’s fortunate Scotland police doesn’t equip officers with anti-drone weaponry, or our galaxy might be one planet poorer today.

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Author

Avatar for Bruce Crumley Bruce Crumley

Bruce Crumley is journalist and writer who has worked for Fortune, Sports Illustrated, the New York Times, The Guardian, AFP, and was Paris correspondent and bureau chief for Time magazine specializing in political and terrorism reporting. He splits his time between Paris and Biarritz, and is the author of novel Maika‘i Stink Eye.

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